fu-un

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We are currently nursing a post-yoga turmeric tonic.  At lunchtime, we slammed ginger lemon shots.  One of us is sick, another feels it coming on and a third (me) feels the subtleties shifting inside me raising a flag.  Two days ago I was out of sync with the universe; or at least that’s how it felt.  I told my coworkers to look out, because I’d woken up on the wrong side of the bed.  We laughed and they joked with me and, ultimately, everything was fine.  But anytime the phone rang I was irritated.  And as if I was being plotted against, everyone on the other end of the line had dementia and a thick accent.  The stapler wanted to see me use my fine motor skills AND my upper body strength (to no avail).  My kimono with the cute little fringe on the bottom kept snagging on everything and cartoonishly pulling me backwards, knocking over chairs and signs and generally drawing attention to myself.  (Eye roll.)  I was in a funk, my head hurt, and a dear friend mentioned that she usually gets that way when she’s getting sick and her body is busy fighting for her.  I wondered; it reminded me of the Pixar movie about feelings and how, when certain ones were preoccupied, or one was left alone in the control room, things leaned precariously in one direction.

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I’m constantly striving to remain balanced in my health – physically and mentally and otherworldly – and I generally have a sense of why things are off-kilter.  And I have a wonderful community around me, including folks far far away, to set me upright when I’m tipping over.  What of people who don’t find themselves in the way of self-awareness?  What of people who don’t have social supports, or at least not ones that can help them get to where they want to go?  Side note: There’s been a rather widespread conversation about the homeless population in my small town and it has me fizzled.  I’m not doing anything in the way of direct service to that community, as I did for years in other cities.  But people’s ideas about homelessness and “what to do about it” still get my gills (seriously, colloquialisms are highly encouraged here…).  More on that another day.

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You know what I was thinking today?  That I’m having fun.  I’m having fun at my job – the office from the seventies that does everything by-the-book and with oh-so-much civil comedy.  I’m having more fun at the Y than I did when I worked there, yoga-ing with my brother and goofing around with my old coworkers.  I’m having fun with the dog (big surprise) and I’m reading a really good book and knitting a new project and going on a date.  And today I got revenge on that stapler by banishing it to the stock room.  Sometimes it’s right and necessary to set up our demons in a cool dark corner where they don’t mold or cook themselves but just set and wait until someone is willing to tinker around and fix them.

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  1. A girl and her dog at enjoying the brightness before the sunset.
  2. A sort of baba ghanoush (originally posted on my instagram) created on the fly by pureeing a whole burnt eggplant with a roasted red pepper and some salt, pepper, and good California olive oil.  A heavy sprinkle of paprika and it becomes a meal for dipping turmeric-roasted potatoes and baby greens (which I do eat with my fingers…)
  3. Dog contemplates forest.
  4. Dog contemplates old building at the local mission site.
  5. Dog finds fresh water.  Dog does not understand why people have to drink bottled water or why cities have to contaminate their water sources with poison.
  6. Dog wishes he could’ve eaten this: spaghetti squash with the leftover Christmas turkey (steamed in parchment paper to keep it juicy), whiskey-caramelized onions, a mashed up California veggie burger, and a creamy vegan sauce made with pantry staples like almond milk and tapioca starch, happy powder (nutritional yeast) and other spices.  Topped with avocado.  THIS was decadence.
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